The scant optimism I had at the end of last week is gone.
There was a misunderstanding–the supervisor at Mohela thought the message from Navient about putting the application through on Friday meant that the loans would be de-coupled on that day.
She was mistaken and called me to apologize.
She said her supervisor said we should hear about my application within the month.
The woman I talked to at Navient, however, said it could take up to a year. She also said they were almost never approved. Navient doesn’t get to make the decision; the DOE does.
I was also able to find out why my payments are scheduled to go up so much, from under $200 a month to over $1700. The consolidation means that I’m not eligible for the income-based plan I was on before. I can’t afford the new plan, of course.
Yesterday, I had a consultation with a student loan specialist; his full time job is getting people out of student loan jams. He said there was nothing he could do to help me. Unless the loans are de-consolidated, I’m fucked. He said that the DOE almost never de-consolidates, but that if there was ever a case that merited it, this was it. He said if they don’t, I should hire an attorney, since someone at the PSLF division told me to consolidate when I called to ask if I should actually follow that step. The PSLF person has to have known that he was telling me to do something that would ruin my chances for a PSLF.
The consultant didn’t charge me for our call; he felt too sorry for me. He also asked me to tell him what happens either way. He’s invested in the saga.
I had a stomach ache in the hours leading up to the call. A tightness in my chest and stomach remains. I keep swinging between numbness and crying.
So what now?
If I haven’t heard anything from the DOE by October, when student loan payments resume, I will have to try to explain to the system that they shouldn’t base my repayments on what I made last year.
The last few years, I’ve been killing myself by working 2+ jobs. 7 classes at Davis + 3 freshman seminars + 3 summer classes + the grad class in Forensics + 3-5 Los Rios classes a year + scoring for IB and AWPE + my books. And that’s the paid labor.
I’ve been doing this to finally pay off my medical and consumer debt, which happened a couple of months ago. I also wanted to finally have a little bit in savings, so I could handle the next pet emergency, the next car repair, without going into hock.
It’s vital, though, that I scale back, both for my health and because I fear I will become bitter about the extra classes if they become tied to this almost a quarter of a million dollars consolidation mistake.
I never want to lose the joy in teaching.
By bringing my income back down to where I’m living month to month, in fear of every high air conditioner bill, I might be able to reduce the monthly payment to 1200 a month. I would scrape by like that for 10 years before asking if whatever remained on my tab might finally be forgiven.
Again, this assumes the DOE punishes me for following their instructions.
Of course, this isn’t all that’s happening this week. I need to see my gyno about the bleeding, but won’t be able to until August 19th. I think I’m looking at some kind of procedure down there, but I don’t know what.
Our power keeps going out for a few hours at a time.
I was supposed to have a date this weekend, but I called it off. I’m dealing with too much to handle dating right now.
But I am walking everyday. I’m up to 2.5 miles.
And I’m still enjoying showing you wrap pictures.
