I’ve spent a great deal of my life trying to avoid migraines in all their forms. A particularly nasty one I can get is a menstrual migraine, signalling the start of my period; it used to ruin 2-3 days of each month.
Once I had insurance (and thus a PCP), we tried a lot of different types of birth control pills, usually with a very low hormone dose to try to have the line between non-period hormone levels and period hormone levels be close (it’s the change in hormone levels that triggers the migraine).
And then a female pharmacist found a solution:
“Why do you keep changing your pills?”
“We’re trying to find one that won’t give me a menstrual migraine.”
“Then why don’t you just take your pills straight through and not have menses?”
And that worked. For years.
For many glorious years.
Several months ago, however, I started having menstrual migraines and some bleeding.
I thought it might be menopause, even though I’m young.
(Why not? My body breaks in all the other ways despite my youth.)
I made a note to bring it up to my PCP and decided to embrace it, if that’s what it was. Naturally, I embrace things by bringing them up to the cats all the time.
“Graymalkin! Stop scratching the couch! I have menopause!”
My PCP, though, said I was too young for menopause and that I probably had a uterine fibroid instead.
A vaginal ultrasound* showed a fibroid.
Mystery solved, I thought.
I was then referred to a gynecologist; I hadn’t had one because I make my poor PCP do the annual exams.
She said a) the fibroid wasn’t causing my migraines and b) I had to change my birth control pill because of my stroke risk.
I let her have her way with the pill change, but I told her I wanted one that would keep me migraine-free.
She said that wouldn’t be an issue, because she was sure I hadn’t been having menstrual migraines again anyway.
???
She said I was having regular migraines that happened to coincide with breakthrough bleeding.
“Except menstrual migraines feel different from regular ones,” I said.
I started the new pill several months ago. My boobs hurt now. All the time.
And once a month, I’ve had a menstrual migraine, followed by bleeding that lasts for several days.
Having established a pretty clear pattern, I emailed my gyno.
Don’t worry, everyone. She said I’m not having periods. I’m just having breakthrough bleeding at regular intervals and coincidental migraines.
“How do I stop the migraines and bleeding that so effectively mimics menstrual migraines and menstruation?”
She said I could try an implant, but that I would definitely have breakthrough-bleeding-that-is-totally-not-a-period.
So I’m waiting it out, hoping that my body will get used to this new medicine. Menstrual migraines used to be my most controlled pain.
I know menopause can be awful, but I look forward to a time when I can at least know for certain what’s going on.
*For those who don’t know, they have to stick an ultrasound wand in your pussy and take a look around; at one point, they have to do the shocker; since I had had this procedure before, I wasn’t surprised at the shocker, which pleased the poor technician who has to break the news to people all day long (and then put her finger in their unhappy asses).
