Two different men this week have messaged me from afar, telling me that they could simply move to Davis. I have to give them points for having actually read my profile, which says I don’t want a long distance relationship. However, I think it would be a good idea to actually date someone for a long time before having them move to Davis for me. This would, of course, necessitate long distance dating, so we’re back to square one.
I have explained to both men that I don’t want to do the long distance dating that might (in a long shot) lead to a move.
One man* just messaged me with this rejoinder:
“Honestly i liked you very much (i mean initial impressions as we just met here). I have work from home option. So if you think we can date and see if we are a match i can move closer to your location. I live alone and it doesn’t matter for me if i live in Davis or San Jose. So location is not an issue for me. Just to make things clear for you, after few dates if you think i am not right for you, i don’t mind or feel bad that i had moved close to your location or so. You are free to take your decision any time. Honestly i like white/cacausian woman very much. I respect all religions and believe all humans are same. Hope you understand and if you like my basic info please let us try to see if we are good for each other or not by dating. You can decide it over an uncondittional time ( any number of years that is good for you). Appreciate your thoughts. Thanks.”
What’s a polite but firm way to say “Please don’t move here”?
**** BREAKING NEWS: While I was writing this post, he messaged me with a response to my assurance that we did not have enough in common to break my “no long distance” rule.
“I like nature and healthy life style. I think you are also of the same type.”
WTF? I actually regret the small amount of time I left the house today (I could have gotten so much more done if I’d stayed inside!). And while I reheated a very health 13 bean soup to serve when people came over to watch Star Wars, I enjoyed it with a bottle of wine. And there was dessert. And lots of buttery bread to go with said soup. The 10 whole minutes of yoga I did this morning probably does not absolve me of these crimes.
I am going to go to bed and both a) stop trying to persuade the unpersuadable about the fact that I do understand both myself and what I want out of dating b) blogging about said unpersuadable person.
*He’s Indian-American. Dedicated readers will know that I’ve mentioned a trend in many messages I receive from Indian-American men: they only post one picture; they don’t write more than a couple of sentences about themselves; they don’t answer the questions the site provides for matching. This man proves the rule.
