Don’t assume I’m not into sci-fi or that I’m one of those people who seems proud to announce that they’ve never seen one of the most groundbreaking series in movie history.
I can recite the three original films. I can recite the pieces of commercials that ended up on my VHS recordings of those films too.
There’s a two foot tall R2D2 living in my room–he’s rocking my David Bowie Goblin King wig.
My favorite childhood T-shirt, with an iron-on of Princess Leia, has been lovingly sewed into a pillow.
The reason I don’t give a damn about the new movie trailer is because WE’RE ALL GOING TO SEE THAT MOVIE ANYWAY.
Some parts of the trailer are cool; some suck–it doesn’t matter at all.
Oh, a woman takes a light saber? Well, the woman with the light saber in the last film was the only Jedi to go down without a fight.
Oh, there’s a black storm trooper and that’s impossible? He could be dressing up like that to rescue a princess–it’s happened before.
Oh, an ancient Harrison Ford wanders in and you wonder if Shia Labeouf is right behind him?
It doesn’t matter–we’re all going to see this movie.
Most of us are suffering PTSD from the prequels, but we’re still going to see this movie.
Let’s be honest. That trailer could have been filled with nothing but Ewoks and Jar Jar.
It could have announced that this new film was going to be called The Star Wars Christmas Special Returns: Now with more Itchy and Bea Arthur!
WE’RE ALL GOING TO SEE THAT MOVE ANYWAY!
Okay, that made me laugh out loud (especially now, having seen the actual move SW VII:TFA twice). But I refuse – refuse, do you hear? – to use the dreaded, and now pretty much meaningless, “LOL”.
In related news, for sometime now, I have been advocating for COL (Chortle Out Loud), GOQ (Giggle Out Quietly), ChI (Chuckle Inwardly), and other such acronyms to have more choices that actually mean something. Every time I see “LOL”, I am tempted to quote that line from The Priness Bride, where Inago Montoya says to Vizzini, “You keep on using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means”